Relating to Other People

They..........didn't believe me!
You...........should stay quiet!
I................don't look at the world the same way!

Post Reply
Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Mon Jan 13, 2014 4:38 am

Jimmy
As a person who was significantly changed after an NDE I have been desperate to talk to others about the significance of what happened and what continues to happen now long after. I have begun to keep my experiences to myself  but my soul wants to scream about them. It seems to only isolate others and create a longing for someone to really understand it with me. Many of us know what we experienced was real and some of us continue to have strong spritual experiences long afterwards but have difficulty finding others like ourselves to share it with.  If you can relate please have a chat here.
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary



Jimmy
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Jan 27, 2014 9:10 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Jimmy » Mon Jan 27, 2014 10:33 pm

I do have some difficulty relating to others especially of the Christian faith about it. It seems the experience I had although meeting Jesus doesn't fit the theological mold of modern church going Christianity. God was far more loving and kind than that expressed by many Christians I know. Jesus was also far less judge mental than any of the church going Christians I know. I now know God is kind and excepting like a real loving father except a lot bigger. The gay people I used to think would go to hell are so deeply loved by God. I now know I was dead wrong. I scare people with the things I have experienced or they think Im nuts somehow, but, I know inside my heart what happened and what continues to happen. Unlike before the OD I know things that will happen and dream about things that happen and see visions/ pictures that represent answers to things I would not normally know. I have a peace so deep I have never known in spite of my failures and shortcomings. I feel a spiritual presence with me all the time now that is Gods loving presence and have a love for people I cannot explain of myself. It all happened when I was in a coma for two days and touched death twice. It makes me feel alone sometimes or alienated from other people yet my life is filled with so many blessings and tons and tons of love. I no longer see problems as road blocks, I see them for ways God uses to make me stronger in loving other people and stronger in wisdom to serve his awesome purposes. I probably sound nuts to other people when I go on like this, but sometimes my heart is bursting with wanting to know others who have experienced the same awesome power I experienced when I was on my death bed. Hope I didn't come across too thick here. Not meant at all.

dnix71
Posts: 79
Joined: Mon Jan 27, 2014 6:41 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by dnix71 » Tue Jan 28, 2014 2:45 pm

Western society denies or is frightened by the non-physical world. Non-religious people mock those who speak or believe in a life beyond this one.

"Christians" get hung up on dogma, too. The Bible doesn't always say what they think it says because any spoken language has to be interpreted by the hearer. If you travelled to a far land and return and tell people about where you went, words alone will never be enough.

Don't let naysayers discourage you.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Thu Jan 30, 2014 11:51 pm

Jimmy, I can relate to everything you said. I know I was told - "It's ALL about love."

Singh
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jan 29, 2014 11:56 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Singh » Fri Jan 31, 2014 1:04 pm

Most people of this world are attached with this visible world too much. they are unaware of an invisible world which is our real home. People of this world are more interested in their temporary homes in this world and have no interest in their permanent home in another world. The fortunate ones who had experienced the unconditional love from their permanent home should tell this reality to the other people. In Sikh religion it is all described in holly Guru Granth Sahib (the living Guru of the Sikhs) that how you can become permanent residents of that world while living in this world also. There are the conditions to stay there otherwise they don't let the soul stay there even after the death in this world. then soul must have to take birth again and again until it fulfill the conditions. So this human life is golden chance to be eligible for that beautiful ,peaceful and blissful place.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Fri Jan 31, 2014 10:06 pm

Jimmy your quote:
"I do have some difficulty relating to others especially of the Christian faith about it. It seems the experience I had although meeting Jesus doesn't fit the theological mold of modern church going Christianity. God was far more loving and kind than that expressed by many Christians I know. Jesus was also far less judge mental than any of the church going Christians I know. I now know God is kind and excepting like a real loving father except a lot bigger."

Jimmy, I think Christ's life and death were all about his love for us. Some of us have been privileged to feel it in a way that is foreign to this world, thus difficult for others to understand in the way we are now able to understand. They try to feel and understand, but limitations exist. I think they try to do the best they can with the limitations.

And: "I have a peace so deep I have never known in spite of my failures and shortcomings. I feel a spiritual presence with me all the time now that is Gods loving presence and have a love for people I cannot explain of myself."

Me too. You have explained yourself very well. The holy spirit is profoundly present for me too. I think without it... I would find this world almost impossible to live in.

quivara
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Feb 04, 2014 12:32 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by quivara » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:48 pm

I've had just some "Mystical expereinces" and some mild OBEs, yet I find I can with one person alive (who never experienced such herself, but is tolerant) and one now dead dear old friend who had an NDE in WWI. He listened and accepted with interest and understanding. I wait to find an empathetic, spiritual person but mostly that doesn't work either. Most people scoff or think I'm nuts. I find reviewing it and discussing it in my private prayers. Some aspects come back, occasionally clarity is given, but largely I return to the peace I felt. Best wishes, Quivara

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Thu Feb 06, 2014 5:36 am

quivara wrote:I've had just some "Mystical expereinces" and some mild OBEs, yet I find I can with one person alive (who never experienced such herself, but is tolerant) and one now dead dear old friend who had an NDE in WWI. He listened and accepted with interest and understanding. I wait to find an empathetic, spiritual person but mostly that doesn't work either.


Most people scoff or think I'm nuts. I find reviewing it and discussing it in my private prayers. Some aspects come back, occasionally clarity is given, but largely I return to the peace I felt. Best wishes, Quivara
I wait to find an empathetic, spiritual person but mostly that doesn't work either.


Most people scoff or think I'm nuts.
I hope and imagine in due time you will find being here, many people that you can discuss this with
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

Arrow
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jan 15, 2014 6:55 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Arrow » Tue Feb 18, 2014 5:21 pm

Relating to others seems to be smoothing out for me. I have found someone to speak openly with and it is a blessing.
At first it was like I was so unconcerned, I still am more mellow in some ways and laugh at future plans :D
[bible]Love One Another[/bible]

Dina
Posts: 27
Joined: Mon Jan 27, 2014 4:44 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Dina » Mon Feb 24, 2014 5:01 pm

Fortunately, there are now wonderful groups such as this . Before, people had to swallow their experience, for the fear of being rejected or considered nuts.

CathyK
Posts: 494
Joined: Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:32 am
Location: England

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by CathyK » Fri Feb 28, 2014 10:07 am

Hello Jimmy, Dina, Ano1, dnix71, Quivara and Arrow

Have your experiences all been published on the Nderf websites? I should like to read them in order to chat about them! If I cannot read them elsewhere, could you please relate your stories here?

I can easily understand that if you've had a profound spiritual experience, (maybe taking weeks, months or years to process), it would be difficult not only to know where to begin speaking of the experience, but others may instinctively perceive such a gap between you and them that the gap cannot be bridged. Is it possible that you are set apart from others because of your very experience?

I've had experiences which, whilst not as profound or spiritually elevating as yours may have been, are sufficiently different from the norm as to be unable to share them with most people. As is so often stated, 'they would think I was nuts'. But does that really matter? We are all mere mortals, not a race apart, and one tends to know, intuitively, when another is likely to be receptive.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:59 am

Dina:
Fortunately, there are now wonderful groups such as this . Before, people had to swallow their experience, for the fear of being rejected or considered nuts.

You are so right about that. It is what first brought me to this site, many years ago.
It takes time to sort through it all. And, it takes the ability to talk to others who understand.
The isolation I felt was very lonely. Back then no one even had the term nde as a starting point.

Traveler

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Traveler » Mon Mar 24, 2014 5:26 pm

I have been lucky in that I have found someone to talk with about my NDE and the effects it has on me! He's kind, patient and very loving. He will ask questions from time to time, he's very curious about it. I now see a pyscharist on a monthly basis and she has put me on --------. I've seen Angles flying toward me, they are beautiful....red and gold flames. Each of them are holding either a bow and arrows or a flaming sword! They one time they appeared, I was driving my vehicle and about to cross a bridge. The voice in my head that I call Dark Man, DM, was telling me to -----------! That's when the Angels appeared! This happened just last Thursday as I was driving to work. Has any one else expereinced some thing like this?? I know the Angels appeared to protect me and keep DM from taking control. The feeling I had at the time was complete peace and joy! :D

I would love to talk with others if they've had similar experiences. Do others have "people" in their heads? I have a total of 5, 3 of which appeared after my last NDE. The 1st voice, Jessica has been with me since I was about 11 years old, I'm now 56. DM appeared a month or so before my last --------- attempt. And the last 3 appeared after the attempt.
{edited by Misha, see below}

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Tue Mar 25, 2014 2:40 pm

Hi Traveler,

Glad you are here. Unfortunately, except in some specific circumstances, we do not allow talk about suicidal thoughts on the forum. It's not your fault; we are updating the rules section.

Misha

suzy
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed May 21, 2014 12:37 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by suzy » Mon May 26, 2014 12:42 pm

Jimmy, I can relate. Although I have not found anyone to share experiences with I too have felt this enormous feeling of peace and love. We are not in "life" alone and our boundaries extend beyond ourselves. I agree with the concern of judgement of Christians and agree that Jesus was not so judgmental he was the one who talked about casting the first stone. I don't know why some of us have these experiences and others don't and I know that I have not done anything special to bring them on. I have so many stories to share and in all of them the foundation is that of love. wonderful huh?

Marsha, I am new here and I have not figured out how to put things on the website or where is the website? I only found this forum during my "search".

Haha, we are in this together a small sub-culture that has a place to share and encourage their experiences. How nice that is.

Tabooboo
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2014 4:29 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tabooboo » Fri Jun 13, 2014 8:44 pm

I've had a difficult recovery, and have been terribly depressed since my experience. Not only have I been disabled after working my entire life, I have a malpractice lawsuit pending, and I feel 2 dimensional, and lost. I have fear when I discuss my nde, don't know for sure what happened, but know in my heart what I saw. I feel that people are just placating me bc I am still sick, and have another surgery in August. The last thing I need right now is judgment regarding my sanity, or what I believe in. I feel like someone shook me so hard that I'll shake forever. I need to talk about this. I know how u feel, at least a little.

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Fri Jun 13, 2014 8:46 pm

Well you come to the right place to talk to people

welcome home
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Fri Jun 13, 2014 10:11 pm

Tabooboo,

When was your experience and will you tell us about it in some detail?
You and I are about the same age. I can relate to not working after doing so for so many years too--that is its own change.

Over the years I have often read that it takes on average seven years to begin to grasp the nde. Some people seem to do it more quickly but I know it took a long time for me. I know, I was very angry about things for a long time. Everything about life here seemed so unimportant for a long, long time. But, eventually I learned to belong here and in a sense there too, all at the same time.
If you felt the love...then you know how incredibly loved you are. Allow yourself to just take it slowly. I believe everything will gradually begin to come together.

Talk to us. This site at this time is non-judgmental.

Tabooboo
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2014 4:29 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tabooboo » Mon Jun 16, 2014 9:47 am

I explained in another post the "pleaidian" experience. In brief I had 2 major surgeries bw the 11th and 15th of March of this year. The surgery on the 15th was an emergency surgery to repair damage done on the 11th. I wrote up during the surgery in excruciating pain, saw tall beings of light standing behind the people working on my, and had my great grandmother whose been gone for many years tell me not to give up. I'm getting everything from "medically induced hallucinations" to you name it. Some people believe me, some don't. I'm starting to question what I saw, well I question everything now that I'm trapped in the house. I wish socialism was here in the US. Anyone ever woke up during surgery and see something like this?

Jem7
Posts: 177
Joined: Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:07 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Jem7 » Mon Jun 16, 2014 2:47 pm

Tabooboo,

I believe you! Why should someone disbelieve you? You are the expert on your own life and your own experience. I could potentially tell someone, "Your story is hard for me to interpret," but saying "I don't believe you" is a little extreme! That's not nice.

NDE experiencers are teachers because they have seen behind the veil. But right now, one of our teachers (you) is hurting because you went through a huge trauma. It will be hard to forgive god or doctors for letting that happen, but I think forgiveness if your ticket to improvement. This is easier said than done, but try (if you can) to accept everything about your current situation. Sure, you can sue, write letters, visit Drs -and all of that may be necessary- but try to internally realize that regret and anger isn't going to change your health, finances, or anything, for the better. Work hard outwardly; accept inwardly.

Surgical awareness is horrible. Please realize it will take time for your brain, body, emotions, dignity, etheric body, you name it (everything!) to recover. You went through something that no human being should go through. Like any trauma, you need time, a few hundred nights good sleep, friendship, compassion, love, moral support, etc. It seems like light beings were there to help you. It seems like they were there to prevent the situation going too far. Please find hope that they were SENT, and that you were fortunate enough to perceive them! In fact, this unwanted experience may turn out to be a gateway to new abilities and sensitivities.

We're sending you healing!

Tabooboo
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2014 4:29 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tabooboo » Mon Jun 16, 2014 11:56 pm

Thanks for all the support. It's lonely getting more support from strangers than my family or friends. I didn't even speak of it until I was out of ICU. I remember asking the nurse if I was dead, and if so why was I in hell? Id had my bowel rupture a stent put into my kidney and a foot long incision. I almost screamed when I looked up to see all the IV stuff hanging over my head. Id had several blood transfusions, and couldn't eat food for days. I supposed my mind had created this scenario to shield me from the pain of what they'd done to me. I'm definitely changed by all this. Has anyone experienced ICU psychosis? I seemingly had it after I was released from ICU. that didn't feel like dreaming either, but there was a vast difference. Could these experiences be at all connected? Some of it was good, but mostly night terrors.

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Tue Jun 17, 2014 3:32 am

Tabooboo,

Unfortunately, many people have more supportive friends than family. Right now, the board is a little quiet. I hope in a few more days, the regulars who are on vacation will be on and active again! You will enjoy them.

Marguy
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:47 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Marguy » Tue Jun 17, 2014 7:04 am

Tabooboo wrote: It's lonely getting more support from strangers than my family or friends.
Hi Tabooboo,
What you went through is already nightmarish in itself and nobody would want to go through this.
But considering your NDE experience, I suppose that it is very difficult for people, never having heard about this type of experience, to accept and believe it. Just think how you would have reacted (before your own experience) if somebody had told you a similar story. It will take quite some time before you have it integrated. It seems that the average time that people with NDE experiences need to integrate it, is between five and seven years.
The problem with family and friends is, that they are used to a person the way she always has been. As soon as the person starts to change or to behave differently, they get uncomfortable with, wondering where the old one is hiding. ;)
Then they don't know how they should behave towards this new aspects of the person. They also have to get used to it.
In a way, we are lonely here, as what we experience is really our own experience, we cannot delegate our experiences to other persons. But on the other hand we are never alone, but it is not easy to find this out. This experience you had will in the end probably be a blessing for you.
Just dont loose patience and confidence.
Have a nice day
Marguy

Natalie
Posts: 112
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 11:46 pm
Location: Manhattan Beach, California

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Natalie » Wed Jun 18, 2014 1:58 am

Hello Tabooboo,

I read your posts and I just want to let you know that although I have not experience an NDE, I can imagine how difficult it must be for you to not be able to discuss such an amazing experience with everyone close to you. I also have a difficult time just discussing this subject with many people. I'm still trying to figure out why so many are so close minded to such wonderful evidence of God and eternity. All of these thousands of NED accounts related by people like you are a gift to the rest of us, they offer hope and faith and a purpose, they validate God and creation and so much more.

I am so sorry to hear about your horrible experience with surgery. I hope you heal soon from so much trauma. And know that people like me would be very glad to read and discuss with you more about your experiences. You should not feel alone.
I am so fascinated by the NEDs, and I appreciate those willing to share them. I am glad that there are forums like this one where those of us who want to read or discuss this subject, are able to do so. It's so nice to have this type of understanding and support from many here.

Natalie

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Mon Jan 19, 2015 12:51 pm

Hi Everyone. I'm new here. I am Robert S from Pa. This is an intetesting topic. One that I've had loads of experience with. For almost 34 yrs. I found that what I'm hearing here is true. You can find that most people on this earth are willing to discuss all the details of their week end. But will believe that theres something wrong with anyone starting a discussion on their experiences reguarding an afterlife, eternity and the like. All I can say is dont get disgouraged.

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Mon Jan 19, 2015 1:34 pm

RobertS wrote:Hi Everyone. I'm new here. I am Robert S from Pa. This is an intetesting topic. One that I've had loads of experience with. For almost 34 yrs. I found that what I'm hearing here is true. You can find that most people on this earth are willing to discuss all the details of their week end. But will believe that theres something wrong with anyone starting a discussion on their experiences reguarding an afterlife, eternity and the like. All I can say is dont get disgouraged.

That is why we run this forum so people can discuss stuff with no fear or reprisal.

Glad to have you join us
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Mon Jan 19, 2015 1:47 pm

I almost forgot. I have a question. Has anyone here found a way to share their experience with others in that all parties are comfortable discussing it? Even getting others interested in their story?

DennisMe
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 293
Joined: Sun Aug 17, 2014 1:05 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by DennisMe » Fri Feb 06, 2015 7:13 am

There is a way, why not join or organize a local group specifically to talk about the subject?
If you can, contact a local IANDS group. If there isn't one, maybe you can consider starting one with help from the good folks at IANDS. There may be a possibility to get help ( a good moderator / host) from a local community non-profit organization. Or you could learn to facilitate groups by taking a course yourself! It isn't all that difficult, you just need to be able to listen well. That could be a longer term option, but why not?

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Sun Feb 08, 2015 12:32 am

Hi Robert,
To be honest with you, I have only found 2 people in the 40 + years since my nde, that I have been completely comfortable with in discussing the subject. There have been some people, over the years, that I thought were open to it but later made comments that told me they didn't truly believe, thus, leaving me uncomfortable.

It is not easy out there to find someone. Years ago, when the internet became popular I went in seach of someone to communicate with...I found this site and it was very helpful. On this site you will most likely find several people you can 'click' with. Here, you have the ability to have private conversations, away from the forum. For me, this was very beneficial, as I made a few friends and we communicated away from here. With their friendship, and understanding, I felt much less isolated and they too, enjoyed the communication. I know the reality of what happened to me and I am, now, much more comfortable with what and who I am.

I've never been to any of these IANDS conferences, but they are probably full of people to connect with.
I am not comfortable in crowds, so they don't interest me.

Hope you find what you're looking for.

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Sun Feb 08, 2015 3:09 pm

Hi DennisMe and Ano1,

First, Thank You for responding to my question. And I must say this being the first time on the full site it is awesome. It took lots more navigation than the mobile site to get here. Thanks Jody it takes a lot of work!

DennisMe lots of good ideas most of which Iv'e tried since my STE. My experience changed me from an introvert to a extrovert. Right after I became more involved with my church. At the time it was introducing a faith revitalizing program called RENEW. Something that I never would have participated in before my STE let alone help within the core group to run it as a co-chair for small group discussion. I was trained as a Facilatator and was responsible for monitoring 30 to 40 groups of about 350 participants. In the process I was asked to speak (with little experience) to large groups about my faith and the program. I continued after it ended to put myself in places where I might be given opportunities to share insights I received from my STE.

Since then my journey has taken me many directions allowing me to share the gift I received from it. Curently I am involved in another local church's Stress and Depression Group where I have gotten to share my STE and its effects on my life numerous times. I will check out IANDS as I have not ever heard of it.

Although, all I have been able to participate in has given me a certian amount of satisfaction, I feel a bit like you Ano1, that most who hear my message patronize me or just don't have the desire to take time from their life to believe. In the almost 34 years since, Iv'e met only two persons who I call friends that I could talk about what my STE is about freely and get the feeling that they wanted to discuss it. And one other individual who from a national evangelization group told me that this information that I want to share "Has The Power to Change The World"

And that's the reason for my request because I have not yet been able to commit what has happened to me in an inteligent way to document it where others might be attracted enough to investigate and make it a part of them and maybe Change the World. So if either of you would share your stories with me I would much appreciate it. I would also be willing to share mine with you and would appreciate input so I might be able to finish it. You can reach me at mrroboto313@hotmail.com

Thanks Again and Peace RobertS
Last edited by Garry on Sun Feb 08, 2015 4:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Edited by Garry to give paragraph breaks for easier reading and digestion

Tracie
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:45 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tracie » Fri Feb 13, 2015 8:13 pm

Hi. I'm new here and SO excited and glad to have found you all. From reading the posts, you all seem like a really great group of people. I had an NDE seven years ago - next month is my anniversary. At first, I didn't pay much attention to what happened to me - I was grateful to be alive and had young kids, so I continued my focus on them. But, now...my kids are older and I keep having flashbacks to my experience. Is this normal? Also, I've found myself more and more angry since they began. Is THIS normal? I've seen a few counselors, but all of them want to dive into my childhood - none are interested in my NDE and I think that's the crux of what's going on. I want to quit my job, I want to divorce my husband, I want to leave the area I live...I want to go out and LIVE. I have no patience for stupid people, no patience for people who don't appreciate life. All of this is incredibly overwhelming and I'm not sure where to turn. Is this a result of my NDE surfacing, or have I just simply lost it and need to be fitted for a pretty white wrap-around coat?
Thanks for any insight, experiences or thoughts you have.

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Sat Feb 14, 2015 6:13 am

Hi Tracie,

Welcome to the group! Yes, a mix of feelings (not all of them good) is normal for someone who has had an NDE. Maybe someone else, like 'ano' can chime in, but being angry about being in this low vibration, not-enough-love world is very common. It's called assimilating the experience and it usually takes a number of years.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Sat Feb 14, 2015 1:58 pm

Hi Tracie,

Wow, do you sound like I did about seven years after my experience.
I had repressed mine for about that long too. Then, I went though an angry-at-God stage for quite a few years. I was mad that I had to return, but with time, realized the choice to return was mine.

I explored new age religions and all sorts of different ideas.

I spoke with a counselor too, but that didn't last more than one session, as I realized she didn't know what to do with a nde'r. She wanted to talk about other things. I needed someone to understand my experience, she just wasn't able.

Gradually, I spoke to a trusted friend about my experience, she listened, didn't know how to respond, but just telling someone made me feel somewhat better.

I do know that I have never found love like the love I experienced 'there'. 'Here', I never will. That, is a fact I have come to accept. I must go on, for reasons I may or may not, someday, understand. I believe the plan is bigger than me, and I have come to trust in that.

The closest I have ever come to the 'love' has been the love of my children. When they were small, I needed them and they needed me. My husband knows about my nde, although the thought of it makes him feel uncomfortable, he respects me about it. And that means a lot.
I do know the world can be even more lonely without a support system around you, even if they don't really understand.

There are these groups around the country, called INADS, (I think that's right) They are experiencers that get together. You can probably find where they are located though this site, or INADS directly.
If you asked me for advice, I would say, maybe, try one of their meetings. Find people you can relate to about this.
I would also caution you to not make any big life changes until you work though your feelings. That may take a long time.

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Sat Feb 14, 2015 2:41 pm

Hi Tracie, welcome. All the things you have said hit home for me as I experienced a lot of what you described. It kicked in years later and now I just have become resigned to accept everything that happens and have no expectations. Also I've had my issues with God because in having my STE (an NDE like experience) I mistakenly thought I was protected from bad things happening to me and then I lost my son Robert. Others who have not experienced what we have will never understand. My wife knows I have had it but would rather I keep silent and not seem off to others. In time you will get used to everything.

Tracie
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:45 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tracie » Tue Feb 17, 2015 9:32 pm

Thanks so much for everyone's quick responses! How great to have such a dependable group of people. I want to change up my life and go LIVE it, rather than living how society expects us to live. Have you guys felt like that? I know there's nothing to fear on the other side, and I just want to have fun while I'm "stuck" here in this life. If you've done this, how did you reconcile it with those around you? The majority of people don't understand what we've been through so how do you explain?

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Tue Feb 17, 2015 10:06 pm

Tracie

Have you posted or written out what happened in your NDE

I know we all would love to read it
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Tue Feb 17, 2015 10:50 pm

Yes Tracie. I also would love to hear your experience as well as share mine if you would like. Robert.

Tracie
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:45 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tracie » Wed Feb 18, 2015 11:43 am

Sure, I can share. I love reading about others' experiences, so I guess I should share mine.

Mine happened seven years ago, almost to the day. I had a year of unexplained passing out. No one could figure out what was going on...I was a healthy mid-30's mom and wife. Very active (Ironman triathlete). I had several episodes of passing out without warning. It didn't matter where: at work (I am a teacher), in the car, in the kitchen...wherever. I finally had an internal heart monitor placed and it would monitor my heart activity 24/7. I'd go in every month to have it read, unless something really drastic came up, then I was to call and go in immediately. On Mar 1, in the middle of the night, I died.

Although I was sleeping, I knew I had died. I woke up with jolt, my heart racing (like usual after coming out of these episodes). And like usual, I couldn't speak. But I was crying. I had just been to heaven and wanted so badly to go back but also tell my husband to tell our kids how much I loved them. My husband woke up and tried to get me to calm down. It's hard to explain but I had just had an episode where if I had been awake, I would have passed out. But instead of everything going black, this time, I went to heaven. It was inexplicably beautiful. I was warm, loved, comforted, no fear, th environment was so pretty, and I was so anticipating meeting Jesus. The light was bright, but it didn't hurt my eyes; I wanted to be in it.

I wasn't in my body, but I wasn't a spirit either. It was something in between. I knew I wanted to keep walking to the light but someone/something said, "What do you want?" I reached out my hand to go forward and opened my mouth to speak...I wanted to go to heaven - it was SO wonderful! But, at the same time, I also wanted my kids to know how much I loved them and I wanted to touch them one more time. All I did was THINK about turning my head back to see them sleeping (I could see them sleeping, even though they were both in different and separate rooms), and I was suddenly back in my bed, awake and hysterical.

I wanted one more time with my kids, but at the same time (and even now), I wanted so much to go to heaven.
When I went to the hospital the next day, at my husband's insistence, it turns out I flatlined on the EKG for 14 sec. I spent 14 sec in heaven and every day think about how I should have stayed. But, I guess I am not done here? Something about my kids. Not really sure as time goes by and especially on the anniversary, I start questioning why I was sent back. It's very difficult.

{Misha: added some breaks for readability}

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Wed Feb 18, 2015 12:25 pm

Hi Tracie, that is a beautiful experience that you had. The feeling is indescribible and only those who are lucky enough to have it know it's draw back to it. My experience was a little different. It was just posted on Sunday. I' m puting a link for you http://www.oberf.org/ste_prayer_dbv.htm my story is number 305. Tell me what you think. Peace Robert!

Tracie
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:45 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tracie » Wed Feb 18, 2015 7:31 pm

RobertS wrote:Hi Tracie, that is a beautiful experience that you had. The feeling is indescribible and only those who are lucky enough to have it know it's draw back to it. My experience was a little different. It was just posted on Sunday. I' m puting a link for you http://www.oberf.org/ste_prayer_dbv.htm my story is number 305. Tell me what you think. Peace Robert!

Wow, Robert! What a story! First, I am so sorry you felt so much despair and pain that you wanted to end not only your own life, but others as well. But, I am happy to know God spoke to you through the music you seemed to love so much. He found a way to reach you and change your plans. God can be so good when we need him the most!

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Wed Feb 18, 2015 7:55 pm

Interesting theory regarding the music

I have heard many of the parts you spoke of and remember thinking that was interesting to have in a song as such

not just one of the songs you mention , but several


Just out of interest would you consider listing the songs that inspire you and narrating as to What they say that speaks to you .

Let me know and I will set up a separate forum for this

Garry
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Wed Feb 18, 2015 11:43 pm

Thank You Tracie. You know there are many songs I use, and you could too , daily to help cope with the stress we live with . Let me know if you are interested in learning about them.

Gary, Yes the idea of sharing what I find good in music sounds like something I've been seeking . I would like to be able to do just such a thing. Let me know more about it. Thanks Robert.

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Thu Feb 19, 2015 5:29 am

RobertS wrote: Gary, Yes the idea of sharing what I find good in music sounds like something I've been seeking . I would like to be able to do just such a thing. Let me know more about it. Thanks Robert.
I will discuss it with Misha and get back to you
Garry wrote:Just out of interest would you consider listing the songs that inspire you and narrating as to What they say that speaks to you .

Let me know and I will set up a separate forum for this
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

Tracie
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:45 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Tracie » Sat Feb 21, 2015 10:24 pm

RobertS wrote:Thank You Tracie. You know there are many songs I use, and you could too , daily to help cope with the stress we live with . Let me know if you are interested in learning about them.

Gary, Yes the idea of sharing what I find good in music sounds like something I've been seeking . I would like to be able to do just such a thing. Let me know more about it. Thanks Robert.

Music speaks volumes to me. Always has. I feel like God speaks to me through songs, or even just the music. Good idea for a thread!

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Sun Feb 22, 2015 7:22 am

RobertS wrote:Gary, Yes the idea of sharing what I find good in music sounds like something I've been seeking . I would like to be able to do just such a thing. Let me know more about it. Thanks Robert.
I have created a private forum for you Robert

test it out and let me know if there are any problems

Click this link to go directly to it

http://nderf.me/forum52.html
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Sun Feb 22, 2015 10:22 pm

The song that really works for me is, "Wayward Son" by Kansas.
That song can only be about an nde.

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Wed Feb 25, 2015 12:43 pm

Hi traci and ano1 I am puting a link here to the forum that Gary set up for me to share what I feel is in music. It is http://nderf.me/topic930.html I have mentioned two songs and given a short comentary on them. You can't post a comment there but please tell me what you think back here. A lot of music I like does help me to relate with other people. If you or anyone else in this discussion have songs that you would like to have me explore mention them here and I will check them out like the song " Ano1 feels is about a NDE. " WAYWARD SON" by KANSAS. It's interesting that you get that from it. What says that to you? As one of my favorite songs I believed that it might be about an STE. Peace, Robert.

Natalie
Posts: 112
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 11:46 pm
Location: Manhattan Beach, California

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Natalie » Fri Feb 27, 2015 2:08 am

Hi Robert,

I Just read your STE story. It offers so much hope. What a beautiful and positive transformation, it should be read by all those going through dispair and low points in life.
So glad you shared your story.

Natalie

RobertS
Posts: 43
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2015 12:34 pm

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by RobertS » Fri Feb 27, 2015 12:40 pm

Hi Natalie,

Thanks so much for the kind and encouraging words. Believe it or not, after 34 years of sharing my story many different ways and to as many people as I' ve been given an opportunity to share, I need those responses to energize me to continue. As I said that I have shared it a lot but everytime I hear about an event of violence like a murder/suicide I am torn apart inside because it has not been shared enough to prevent it from happening to others. I wanted to write a book or otherwise work to spread it full time. But I am not financially able to do that. Right now I am thankful that I can share it here and also share my thoughts on specific songs, thanks to Gary. If you or someone you know of any artists or songs, let me know and post it here.
Thank You again for reading it and sharing your thoughst

RobertS

michellekia
Posts: 32
Joined: Tue Apr 07, 2015 10:15 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by michellekia » Wed May 06, 2015 2:05 pm

I have had what I believe is an NDE and several OBE's. I do not think we are here to do anything but realize our true home. I believe that we are really there in our true home but by some kind of illusion we believe that we are here. I only share my NDE/OBE stories with those who want to listen and explore my spirituality with those who want to explore theirs. "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear", is an old saying, and it is true. You don't need to seek out those that want to learn more of our true home. You will meet these people, because just like you, this is where their path is right now. I believe eventually everyone will have their time. It is difficult, especially after having a difficult existence to want to continue here as I get weary. I see this as pointless. I try my best to show love and remember love at all times as this is all that really matters. 'Living' is really hard and I can't wait until this journey is over but I will get through it day by day and try my best to just love and forgive others.

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Wed May 06, 2015 10:37 pm

michellekia wrote:I have had what I believe is an NDE and several OBE's. I do not think we are here to do anything but realize our true home. I believe that we are really there in our true home but by some kind of illusion we believe that we are here. I only share my NDE/OBE stories with those who want to listen and explore my spirituality with those who want to explore theirs.
we all here would love to hear your stories as that is why we are all here

"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear", is an old saying, and it is true. You don't need to seek out those that want to learn more of our true home. You will meet these people, because just like you, this is where their path is right now. I believe eventually everyone will have their time. It is difficult, especially after having a difficult existence to want to continue here as I get weary. I see this as pointless. I try my best to show love and remember love at all times as this is all that really matters. 'Living' is really hard and I can't wait until this journey is over but I will get through it day by day and try my best to just love and forgive others.
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Thu May 07, 2015 9:38 am

Hi Michelle

Sometimes this virtual reality home away from home is hard!

We're glad you are here

Connected2eternalove
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed May 13, 2015 4:54 pm
Location: Orange County, CA

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Connected2eternalove » Sat May 23, 2015 4:16 pm

Yes, this reality away from home certainly is difficult. I feel isolated most of the time. I wish I could talk to everyone about my experiences, but I feel like most people are so superficial. I really just want to connect to everyone, but i don't know how to have meaningless chit chat. I want to discuss the meaning of life lol. I really don't have any friends because I've never been normal. I keep to myself and I know that's not healthy. There must be a way out of this.

Marguy
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:47 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Marguy » Tue May 26, 2015 3:23 am

Connected2eternalove wrote: I wish I could talk to everyone about my experiences, but I feel like most people are so superficial. I really just want to connect to everyone, but i don't know how to have meaningless chit chat. I want to discuss the meaning of life lol.
Unfortunately our society is boosting the superficial and quite often ridiculizing or negating the deeper issues. I have the feeling that not only NDErs feel unnormal, but our society gives this feeling to a lot of people in order to manipulate them into consuming all those little unnessary things, and people aren't even aware of this. They let themselves being led by this 'ring in the nose'. But NDErs had their eyes opened to the real values, so they can see behind the lure and this makes them more aware of their difference.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Wed May 27, 2015 2:58 pm

Well said.

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Sat May 30, 2015 4:14 am

Marguy yes!

michellekia
Posts: 32
Joined: Tue Apr 07, 2015 10:15 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by michellekia » Fri Jun 05, 2015 3:45 pm

I am glad there is a site to post NDE & OBE stories as I have a few. I used to find it amazing but I don't anymore. I just really think we are spiritual beings experiencing an earthly 'life' and not the other way around (earthly being experiencing a 'spiritual' experience).

Brotorious
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2015 7:13 am
Location: Ohio

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Brotorious » Tue Jun 09, 2015 9:53 am

Hi, 1st post- I'm just a guy who has a friend who is somewhat of a curiosity where he works because he died for over 30 minutes. He was sent back, and told me what he saw.
His story is fantastic. He will not share it on a website but tells anyone interested about it freely. He was told things about us, earth and some very deep aspects of Jesus/God/Holy Spirit and was told the validity of all religions that they are all ok. I hope he posts his story somewhere someday. I am hesitant to post much of his story because it is his, not mine. He got me interested in these things. Along with my families experiences, I have become interested in the bigger picture.

Relative to the (Relating to Peeps) topic, he has a hard time dealing with everyday life in that he said "once you have seen the other side, this is life is nothing" and he seems to have lost his focus
over the years. Money/material things have slipped from his needs, which is a good thing I guess- to a degree. His focus at work is lower. He seems to me to be just going through the motions.
He hasn't really opened up to me that much since he told me the whole story a year ago, and his details on the story are becoming less detailed as he seems to be less interested in it. He is being worn down by life. I totally believe him, and almost everything he said aligns with what I feel would be possible and is outright amazing - filled with knowledge and love with no judgement, wisdom given from a collective whole of consciousness (the multitude of souls) who told him about man (us). I wish so much that he would post someday. He said he was not to profit from the knowledge, just share it.

I will post off and on here at the site and tell my mother's OBE/coma story at 9 years old, eventually resulting in diabetes type 1, her death at age 63 from breast cancer in which she saw and named an (unknown to us) entity at the foot of her bed. I travel for a good bit for work and get on and off the NDERF.org site I have posted my moms story and will refer to it in another post.

Seems like a nice crowd here. I just want to learn from you all. I am so excited to hear what all of you have to say! I know very few who think like you (we) do and feel blessed to have a place to listen, learn and share. :-)

Marguy
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:47 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Marguy » Wed Jun 10, 2015 10:18 am

Hi Brotorius
Welcome at the forum.

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Wed Jun 10, 2015 2:36 pm

Hi Brotorius,

Welcome. You might consider getting a small recorder and asking your friend to tell you all about his story with the recorder. It sounds really interesting. The board here is not super active, but it has good people. Both you are your friend are welcome to hang out here! I wonder if what appears as being very passive in your friend is actually just being very peaceful?

Brotorious
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2015 7:13 am
Location: Ohio

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Brotorious » Wed Jun 10, 2015 2:48 pm

Thanks Misha, and Marguy, you know- good idea, I will ask him if he would be willing to be recorded to keep for posterity. Yes, I think he is peaceful alright- I see him changed- outright passive towards a lot of things and a place I feel he thinks he is not part of anymore (to the degree he used to be). He was told he will live a long time. He was told he was sent back for his wife.

Garry
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 1133
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:52 pm
Contact:

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Garry » Thu Jun 11, 2015 4:41 am

Brotorious wrote: Seems like a nice crowd here. I just want to learn from you all. I am so excited to hear what all of you have to say! I know very few who think like you (we) do and feel blessed to have a place to listen, learn and share. :-)
Thank you for referencing us as" A nice crowd " as that was very heart warming " .

It seams from your post,
" I just want to learn from you all. I am so excited to hear what all of you have to say! I know very few who think like you (we) do and feel blessed to have a place to listen, learn and share."
,

that we are achieving our goal which is just that,
" A safe and secure place for people to feel comfortable talking about and sharing their inner most thoughts "

Looking forward to reading more of your postings.

And welcome to your new " Home away from Home "
Image


Why Am I Here


One Look Dictionary

Natalie
Posts: 112
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 11:46 pm
Location: Manhattan Beach, California

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Natalie » Sat Jun 13, 2015 12:11 am

Very nice post You wrote Brotorious!
Nice to hear about your friend. Like you, I am very interested and curious about this subject. We are lucky in this forum, to have so many people here who have had such experiences and are willing to share them and comment about them. It's fascinating.
Natalie

Ace
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 30, 2015 11:56 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Ace » Sun Oct 11, 2015 12:37 pm

I can certainly relate to much of what I've read in this thread. I can remember waking up in the hospital and wanting to tell my doctor about my experience... and he sent a social worker in to talk to me instead. The social worker was trying to break the news to me about how badly I'd been hurt, and I just kept telling him that my desceased grandmother said I'd be OK. (She was right.) He thought I was nuts. My family was told that I had been injured quite badly, and that the head injury might have been making me say all that crazy stuff. I quickly learned not to talk about the experience.

It's not so much that talking to doctors is off limits that bothers me. It's more that I can't talk to my family and friends. Even after figuring out that I was an NDEr, and telling my family about what that meant... they don't want to hear about it. I get that, and I don't want to push stuff on them that they aren't interested in. But it gets hard to talk to them about anything. Friends want to talk about what's on TV... and I can't sit through the kinds of violent TV shows they indulge in. I can't watch the news because of the violence either. I have nothing in common with them anymore.

I've been working on a book. Not to sell it and become famous or anything like that. I just find that since I don't have any other way to work through stuff, that writing is very helpful. And I've been fortunate that I have a friend on the internet, a retired professor who enjoys reading about NDEs, who has been helping me through the process of getting it all down in writing. I'd never have been able to do it alone, because when you write things down, it's like living through the painful experiences all over again and you have to come to peace with things before you can move on and continue writing. So I've needed help working through some things in order to keep writing. I have no idea what I'll do with it once I'm finished. It's really just a book for me.

I do wish I had people close to me that I could talk to about my experiences.

LifeReview
Posts: 462
Joined: Tue Feb 11, 2014 9:17 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by LifeReview » Sun Oct 11, 2015 6:39 pm

Hi Ace

You're not alone. A lot of people dislike violent TV shows, crazy depressing world news, etc.
We're here to learn and to love. Of course your priorities have changed -but that's a good thing!

Ace
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 30, 2015 11:56 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by Ace » Sun Oct 11, 2015 8:15 pm

Thanks, Misha. I guess I've always wondered why I changed so much with each NDE that I've gone through. I'm a childhood experiencer, and I've always felt like I didn't really fit in anywhere. But I was unprepared for the additional changes I went through after an adult NDE.

ano1
Near Death Experiencer
Near Death Experiencer
Posts: 255
Joined: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:00 am

Re: Relating to Other People

Post by ano1 » Mon Oct 12, 2015 9:06 pm

Ace:
It's not so much that talking to doctors is off limits that bothers me. It's more that I can't talk to my family and friends. Even after figuring out that I was an NDEr, and telling my family about what that meant... they don't want to hear about it. I get that, and I don't want to push stuff on them that they aren't interested in. But it gets hard to talk to them about anything. Friends want to talk about what's on TV... and I can't sit through the kinds of violent TV shows they indulge in. I can't watch the news because of the violence either. I have nothing in common with them anymore.
I can well relate to your feelings and comments. It took me years to get where I am. For me, it took much time and the realization that I could trust my feelings and thoughts without caring what anyone else thought about them. Now, mind you, I still don't share too much, but, I no longer need acceptance from anyone other than the loving presence I met during my nde. A presence I remain connected with, daily.

Post Reply